Yawn

You want to know how bored we all were tonight?

Carole did her homework from her music class instead of keeping score.

Kathleen read a copy of the New Yorker that I had loaned to Mike to read an article about Bill James, and he had returned it to me tonight.

I read over some documents that needed my attention.

And Mike and I tried to think of suitable punishments for our newest Cubs, but we couldn't think of anything worse than being subjected to tonight's dreadfully dull 3-0 loss to the Phillies. Despite the first inning taking 45 minutes because neither pitcher could throw strikes, the game only ran 2:38, and that was a good thing; with the early start I was able to get home in time to post this report.

Kenny Lofton and Aramis Ramirez both got loud standing ovations when introduced in the starting lineups and when they ran onto the field. Then Lofton got another ovation when he made a strong throw in on Marlon Byrd's leadoff hit in the gap, to hold him to a single, after which he was wiped out on a double play, before Matt Clement walked the bases loaded and got out of the inning. You still awake? We barely were. And apparently, after that, neither was Lofton or Ramirez, because they both went a meek 0-for-4. Then again, hardly anyone on the club except for Mark Grudzielanek, who had three of the four hits, could do anything with Randy Wolf tonight.

If you didn't see the game on ESPN, Lofton is wearing #1 and Ramirez #15. Maybe that latter number needs to get Jose Hernandez' month of bad baseball out of it first. And come to think of it, the last guy to wear #1 was Augie Ojeda... and I'd hate to see Kenny Lofton start hitting like him.

Matt Clement threw a very nice game. Unfortunately, he gave up two home runs, including one to Jim Thome that flew way over our heads across the street -- probably at least 460 feet. Clement did finish seven innings, allowing only three hits.

Hey, sometimes your team just runs into a buzzsaw pitcher and that's what Randy Wolf was tonight.

A few notes: despite being told by several different sources that the ballpark would open at 4:05 for the early start, it opened at 4:35, leaving us cooling our heels waiting in line to get in for an extra half hour. At least it was sunny and fairly warm until the sun went down, when it actually got kind of cool.

Tonight's promotion -- Frank Sinatra, Jr. singing -- was about the most lame thing I could possibly imagine. He sang an off-key duet with Ernie Banks of "Take Me Out to the Ball Game" and then a very weak version of "My Kind of Town". Whatever they paid him, it was too much.

In the fifth inning, the entire security crew was called over to RCF to carry out on a stretcher, a young woman who apparently had fallen down about ten rows. Bill, the security guard in our section, told us she seemed OK but they didn't want to take any chances. And people were so bored that by the 9th inning they were harassing a guy wearing a Phillies shirt.

Gotta go to sleep now. With a game like this one, I won't have too much trouble falling asleep.