FanPost

heartbreaking

so i haven't watched more than 14 live pitches of the world series since 2003.  just didn't have the heart to watch it.  i'm also a steelers fan (don't hate).   so traditionally, as the cubs season ended, usually in august, i'd go full bore into the nfl season.  in recent years, i put on hold my nfl start waiting for baseball to end, each year hoping it would end in late october.

hasn't happened.  yet.

this year's WS was palatable, because i have family in and near philly.  i still remember when the phillies won in 1983 and how ridiculous they were (i was like 12 then).  i even thought i'd watch some of this year, then i simply couldn't.  i watched when chase and ryan went back to back on sat because i was at a bar, then went back deep into my corona and stopped watching.  i watched a little bit on monday night because i was at a bar, and it was on.  then it got suspended.

after the super bowl, you usually see some shots of the losing team (losers) sitting and watching.  i always thought that was ridiculous.  when i lost, i'd be quick to shake hands and then leave asap (note to belichick: you do this after that game is over, not when you feel like it, you jerk face).  i never understood the self-torture and self-loathing you must put yourself through to watch someone else's unbridled joy at the expense of your own misery.  i never understood it.  i never would do it.

however, i just watched a clip of the last lidge pitch and celebration.  literally, a tear fell down (i'm freaking 37 and still cry about sports?!?!), and i just self-miserated.  wondering, wondering, yet still hoping: substituting all that red with blue, hearing just faintly one last "go cubs go!"

i don't think i'll do that again, and hopefully, after next year, i won't have to.  i was going to post the link here, but you guys know where to find it, and many of you don't want anything to do with this...

i am filled again with anger, sadness,  misery, and hope again.  i hate being a cubs fan.  i love being a cubs fan.

This is a FanPost and does not necessarily reflect the views of SB Nation or Al Yellon, managing editor (unless it's a FanPost posted by Al). FanPost opinions are valued expressions of opinion by passionate and knowledgeable baseball fans.

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