FanPost

OFF DAY FUN: Milton -- Outside the Lines

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a joint project between neverAcquiesce, dtpollitt and Drewishdrewid.

Nobody knows who he is for real.  We've named him Milton, and he's become our near-daily mascot, cheering on every win with us, from various locations around the world.

But what is his story?  Today, on "Outside the Lines" we will explore Milton's past -- born in Osh-Kosh, his father was an itinerant coffee-filter salesman, going door to door, and Milton went with him.  His childhood in India, his teenage years as a kangaroo wrestler with the carnival, and his early adult hood training with the Dali Lama at the top of the world, where for months, he fasted and meditated in a cave in Tibet -- with only a transistor radio for company.  A transistor radio that, as if via a miracle, picked up 720, WGN Radio, and the dulcet tones of Cubs Baseball.

Those words led him on a world-wide pilgrimage -- a man and his cardboard, in search of Wrigley field.

Join us, and tell what -you- know of Milton.  Leave nothing back.  Speak of his first love, the Ecuadorian Princess Maria Conchita Gonzala Luisa Kambada Orana Babusta Perez, and the pain he felt when his third wife left him for Donald Trump. 

Next, on "Outside the Lines".

This is a FanPost and does not necessarily reflect the views of SB Nation or Al Yellon, managing editor (unless it's a FanPost posted by Al). FanPost opinions are valued expressions of opinion by passionate and knowledgeable baseball fans.

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