Cubs Limerick Weekend?

There once was a man named Sianis
whose pet from the park they did banish.
He let out a curse
“May your fortunes be worse
and may all your World Series hopes vanish!”

There was a cute cat,
Warm and fuzzy and fat,
Her picture was posted at Bleedcubbieblue,
In reply to a turgid comment by BLou,
And now she’s mad as a bat.

hickory dickery dock
Hendry has been on the clock
not a deal was made
while BCB crazed
MB should be tosed out on his jock

There once was a man named Jake
To not trade for him was a mistake
His arm got away
And waddya say
Hes now on the wrong side of town.

I loved watching number two-three
His bat was as strong as a tree
He could field the ball
without error at all
Bright managing future I see

There once was a white boy named Dice
Who looked like Fonzie on steriods
blah blah blah blah blah
blah blah blah blah blah
My big black foot in yo’ a**

LOL sorry had to :-)

Hear the tale of this player named Bradley
With a penchant for behaving badly.
On the bench did he sit
’Cause Lou thought he was s**t.
Refrigerator.

Wait…

There once was a fielder named Ryan
the wrong side of the bag he was tryin’
Though his batting average was more than much
he had that damn double clutch
A real shortstop is what Hendry should be buyin’

He was a player they called Fukudome….

(long theatrical pause) what the hell rhymes with Fukudome??

There once was a pitcher named Lilly
To try to hit him was really quite silly
He can kill with a stare
All you batters beware
His curveball will give you a chill-y…?

There once was a Cubbie named Banks
Who the bleacher baskets we can thank
But Morgan didn’t get straight his facts
and the network didn’t lower the ax
Because Steve Phillips was boinking the intern who looked less like a Francine and more like a Frank…

There once was a Cubbie named Trillo,
Who grabbed every ball he could see-o.
He’d scoop it and twitch,
And count every stitch,
And throw it to first one, two, three-o!

Feliz Navidad, Manny, wherever you are!

There once was a night game at Shea
as the ‘69 season slipped away.
The Mets, they did roll
as the umps took their toll.
Agee’s gift kept the poor Cubs at bay.

I haven’t got anything to say
I thought about it all damned day
I’ve read and read
What all of you said
I just want the Cubs to play

There once was a man named Bradley.
Who slumped on the field quite sadly.
He hit like Mendoza,
Made fans miss DeRosa
I hope last season was a Fad(ly)