[Name of player] needs to go. [Player] can't [play defense/pitch/hit/is a cancer].
The solution is to [trade for superstar player/trade for DeRo/DFA player/call up random minor leaguer].
[Stats of problem]
[Stats of solution]
[Value of intangibles that solution brings/cost intangibles problem has].
I know some people value [x stat] but really the problem with that is it doesn't take into account [y stat] which is OBVIOUSLY better and [problem player] has a [number representing y stat], which is [below league average/0/terrible for stereotyped position of player].
[Z stat] is also good. [Solution player] has [z stat] in spades. [I choose to ignore y stat because it doesn't suit my goals or is a small sample size.]
If only [Jim Hendry/Lou/Coaching staff] did [their/his] job[s] we wouldn't be in this mess.
Other incoherent emotional mumbo-jumbo.
I will [stop watching/stop eating/drink more/throw myself off the ledge] if [Hendry/Lou] don't do as my clearly original and insightful post says they should.
Ron Santo for president.
Words to make this fit in as a fanpost because I think my opinion is of more value than the rules of the site. This is also a new thought nobody has had in the past week so you must all see it.
To be more convincing, I didn't use paragraphs.