June 9, 2010
Plaintiff: Theodore Roosevelt Lilly
Defendant: The Chicago Cubs
The plaintiff alleges prejudice and bias with regards to a lack of offensive run support during the 2010 major league baseball season when the plaintiff pitched for the defendant.
Exhibit A: MLB documentation of only 14 runs scored by the defendant in 9 games started and ultimately lost by the plaintiff.
Jury decision: In favor of the plaintiff
Award: Free agency for the plaintiff at the conclusion of the 2010 season with the option of a trade from the defendant to a contending team prior to July 31, 2010. Further, the defendant is remanded to the second division for the duration of the 2010 baseball season.
Bailiff is instructed to escort the defendant from this court to said second division no later than June 30, 2010.
All court costs will be paid by the defendant.
Case closed.
Court adjourned.
Poll
Ted Lilly:
Is traded by the Cubs before the end of the season (81 votes)
Leaves the Cubs as a free agent after the end of the 2010 season (76 votes)
Resigns with the Cubs for more of the same (42 votes)
Goes "All Medieval" on the Cubs' a**es (47 votes)
246 total votes
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