Mercy!  Uncle!  For crying out loud! 

This Cubs team is becoming WAY too predictable.  When the Cubs were in Milwaukee on July 26, they got the bases loaded with nobody out.  The very first thing that went through my mind was: "They're not gonna score any runs".  And that's exactly what happened.  Cubs didn't cash in and they never threatened to score the rest of the night, resulting in a 2-3 loss.  When I was in St. Louis on July 30, they got out to a 5-0 lead after a half inning.  The very first thing that went though my mind was: "They're not gonna hold this lead.  Even if they had a 10-run lead they wouldn't hold it."  And that's exactly what happened.  Not only did the Cubs not hold the lead but they got blown out 5-13.  For all I know the Cubs are going to face a team that's 0-100 and get swept... in a four game series... at home.

Seems like nine games out of ten the Cubs bring their bats to the plate for just one inning.  Usually they'll just load the bases with nobody out... and don't score.  Sometimes we're lucky and get treated to a one-run inning after getting the bases loaded with nobody out.  Other times, the Cubs have a nice three or four run frame early in the game, and then put the bats away.  Then the opposition takes their time coming back.  They score a run here, score a run there, hangs around for a while before pushing the winning run across the plate right at the last possible moment to beat the Cubs. 

My personal analogy for this team is this: This Cubs team is like being broke as a joke with over a week to go before your next paycheck.  You're living off of $50 for the next nine or ten days and you have to use it for gas and food.  You received a lot of money from your last paycheck and you wanted to buy some nice things.  You drove out to the store, bought some overpriced items.  You felt kind of guilty but you knew you deserved it.  As you were driving back home from buying these nice things, your car broke down and you had to pay for an expensive car repair.  Later, you discover that the product(s) you bought worked great, but only for a little while.  The product(s) turn out to be a huge waste of money because of its pathetically low durability.  Later, you discover you didn't read the fine print on the back of the box(es) that tells you "the naked truth" that the advertisement neglected to inform you about before the big purchase.  Now you're stuck.  You have no money to work with and the very expensive stuff you thought was going to be great, really wasn't so great.  Yes, you can lay low for the next week and a half and go with the bare minimum and make the best of what you have.  But no matter how you slice it or dice it, you are stuck with nothing, and it's no fun what-so-ever.  That's what the Cubs are like.  We all know the story of the Cubs from the past few years, because we've re-hashed it over and over on this site, and it's no fun what-so-ever... when they lose the way they've been doing it.  And when I say "lose" I'm not just talking about games, it's all the way to the front office. 

The Cubs had a .346 winning percentage in July (9-17) and that is the worst monthly winning percentage so far in 2011.  In fact, each month is getting worse and worse.  April: .462, May: .407, June: .379, July: .346.  What do we have in store for August?  Well as I'm typing this, Soriano just hit his second homer of the game in Pittsburgh.  Hopefully he gets hot for two months, carries the team, Cubs go on a 54 game winning streak,  and finish the season 97-65.  Wait a tic, Soriano getting hot?  That means Mike Quade will replace Soriano with Blake DeWitt.  (Just Kidding). 

But seriously, I think the key for the Cubs having any success, is to put Reed Johnson out there.  Hopefully I'm not in the minority on that statement but whenever Reed plays, things get done.  Leave Soriano in left, start Reed in center every game, and keep Colvin in right so he gets the regular playing time to prove he can play.  Where's Marlon Byrd?  He was dealt at the trading deadline for some prospects Oh wait, the Cubs didn't make any moves after the 5-13 blowout loss to the Cardinals last Saturday.  Finally, keep Campana as a pinch-run guy and a spot pinch-hit guy when the proper scenario's present themselves. 

Maybe Mike Quade could use some advice from us.  What do the Cubs have to lose?  I think this is how MIke Quade would react to our advice:

 via a1.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net