Tuesday Morning Headlines

Ok -- tomorrow morning my wife is scheduled to have her labor induced, and I will become a father. The upshot for you -- other than the fact that you're caring people -- is that you get your headlines early, albeit less comprehensive.

So, that said, let's dive right in. The main things are the fact that the Cubs played a ballgame, and they're being sold at the end of the season. Not much to talk about, really.

First, the sale.

Jerry Colangelo says he'll wait and see on the Cubs. That's an intriguing possibility, really.

And it seems like all of the Trib's columnists have something to say about the sale -- of the Cubs, that is. None of them seem to hint at how they feel having their corporate parent taken over by a guy called "the Grave Dancer" on Wall Street. Eeyore thinks it will at least shut up the people at the Sun-Times. Eventually. Mike Downey funs around with the idea. Steve Rosenbloom says things. Some of them may be true. He also unleashes this chestnut: "The Astros have a good lineup, maybe great, and a combination rotation-slash-closer that I trust more than any other team, although the Brewers are close."

I try to be nice to the mainstream media folks, partly because I respect them but mostly because I'd like a job out of college and one of them might be an editor when I graduate. So I say this with some manner of trepidation and restraint. Ok, here goes: That statement, Mr. Rosenbloom, is rarified stupid. That is stupid carefully and lovingly raised, hand-picked, packed for maximum freshness and distributed using only the finest ones and zeroes. I seriously think someone needs to take Rosenbloom aside and explain to him that baseball isn't scored with overs. The Astros rotation? Oswalt is great, sure, but Petite is gone and Clemens isn't back yet -- and may yet wander to the AL East or, just possibly, actually stay retired. Jason Jennings is a creditable pitcher, but beyond that... Woody Williams is a flyball pitcher moving from Petco Park to Minute Maid Park. Does anyone see his ERA shooting up like a Roman candle? Yeah, me too. Wandy Rodriguez got toched for a 5.64 ERA last year in the majors, and there's no reason to forecast an improvement. Fernando Nieve... is probably better than those two, but that's not saying much. Closer? Brad Lidge? Trust? I'm not even going to touch that. As far as having a good lineup -- Brad Ausmus slugged .276 last year, and there's no reason to think that's a fluke. Adam Everett is an all-glove shortstop. Craig Biggio is chasing his 3,000th hit with grit, determination and steadily diminishing skills at the plate. And in the NL, those pitchers I listed get to hit, too. That's a good lineup? Ok.

Where were we? Oh, right, sale of the Cubs. Sun-Times website is silent -- although I'd bet money that they will have an article bragging about how their inane Tribune on Trial series had results.

Two big wrinkles here. One, Wrigley Field has not been mentioned as part of the sale yet. That probably bears watching. And the sale has slowed contract talks with Carlos Zambrano. Sam Zell, you may not know this yet, but Carlos is a force of nature who cannot be stopped. You will give him his millions, or he will take them from you. Don't make this any harder on yourself than this has to be.

On the field, we lost one. There are 161 others before we start the postseason. We'll win some of those.

The Employee has been told by the I-Cubs that he needs to get stretched out in Arizona bit more before he can join the rotation. And he needs to stop just wearing the minimum amount of flair.

And, finally, a poll. Vote early, vote often.