Cubs Considering Yuniesky Betancourt? Please Tell Me You're Joking

Via Carrie Muskat's blog, we learn of the Cubs' interest in a mediocre infielder named Yuniesky, to play third base:

Betancourt, 3O, batted .228 in 57 games last season for the Royals, getting limited playing time. He has hit .266 overall in eight seasons... Betancourt was currently playing for Mexicali in the Mexican Winter League, and batting .261 in 12 games. The Cubs have had scouts watching him. The infielder would be willing to move to third base. Betancourt does have some power, hitting 16 homers in 2O1O and 13 in 2O11 with the Brewers.

"Some power"? Even when he hit the 16 home runs, he barely got his slugging percentage over .400 (it was .405). It was .381 when he hit the 13 home runs in 2011; Betancourt's lifetime OPS is .682 and his career OPS+ is 82. As you know, I don't particularly like Luis Valbuena as an everyday player, but if the Cubs actually signed Yuniesky Betancourt to be their starting third baseman, that would be a significant downgrade from Valbuena.

Further, Betancourt has played exactly eight major league games at third base. Why do teams even think about stuff like this? From Carrie's blog, here's why:

Former Cubs shortstop Alex Gonzalez now represents Betancourt, and met with Theo Epstein about the infielder.

Oh. Well, that explains everything. Now the guy who booted the ball that really cost the Cubs Game 6 in 2003 is an agent? Stay away, Theo. Please.