MLB Bullets Tried To Buy The Marlins

We're just fifteen days from actual games, folks. I'm ready for the "silly season" to be over.

• Just in case you thought these stories couldn't get weirder, now Curt Schilling is claiming that "a former Red Sox official" told him to take PEDs in 2008. While he won't name who it was, he's ruled out the coaches and front office people, so that means it likely was someone from the training staff. In any case, a source tells Sean McAdam that "I'm sure if anyone said anything like that, it wasn't meant to be serious." The whole things sounds to me like Curt Schilling thinks we haven't been paying enough attention to him lately.
• Dayn Perry of CBSSports.com looks at all the names dribbling out of the Biogenesis Clinic PED scandal asks "Maybe the Miami New Times didn't print some of those names for a reason?" The evidence against the players not named in the initial report may be far weaker, even if their names did show up in the records somewhere.
• There's no announcement yet, but the Mariners and Felix Hernandez have agreed to a contract extension that will pay him $175 million over the next seven seasons. Ken Rosenthal fears this will not end well for the Mariners.
• Former Florida Governor Jeb Bush tried to buy the Miami Marlins, but was told they weren't for sale.
• Dave Cameron of FanGraphs ranks the ten best moves of the off-season. What do you know? A Cubs deal is listed!
• The Indians and Mike Aviles agreed to a two year, $6 million contract. Normally this is where I say that giving Mike Aviles six million dollars is God's way of saying you have too much money, but I actually like this deal for Cleveland.
• The New York Mets still want Michael Bourn, still don't want to lose their first-round draft pick. The Mets are hoping an arbiter would rule in their favor, but I don't see how. I understand the spirit of the rule is against the Mets losing a pick, but the wording of the CBA is pretty clear.
• Todd Helton was off to buy lottery tickets when he got pulled over for a DUI. Really, Todd? You're going to make five million dollars this season and you've already made $156 million over your career. Haven't you already won the lottery?
• Apparently Jurickson Profar's decision to skip the World Baseball Classic wasn't final. Do it for your country, my fellow Orangeman.
• Angel Villalona is back with the San Francisco Giants. In related news, O.J. Simpson is getting a tryout with the Buffalo Bills.
• The Arizona Diamondbacks are going to let a former college quarterback pitch in a spring training game as part of a reality series. The plot is that Tim Wakefield is going to teach the contestants to throw a knuckleball. The most famous candidate is Doug Flutie, but my money would be on Josh Booty, who actually played thirteen games as a third baseman for the Marlins.
• Kevin Glew of the CBC thinks R.A. Dickey was worth the price the Blue Jays paid for him.
• Micah Owings signed a minor-league deal with the Nationals as a first baseman. Ben Lindberg of Baseball Prospectus thinks the move was long overdue, but isn't optimistic about his chances.
• Mike DiGiovanna finishes his two-part series on Josh Hamilton and says that his streaky tendencies are a cause for concern.
• Contract talks between the Rangers and Elvis Andrus are not "on the same page." It must be tough when you have a pretty good shortstop and also the best shortstop prospect in the game at the same time. I suppose they could move Profar to another position, but the best solution seems to see what Andrus would fetch on the open market. Probably a lot.
• An angry Padres fan made a documentary and got Scott Miller of CBSSports.com to watch it. He's trying to get a boycott going until the Padres "change their ways."
• The Tampa Bay Times once again takes a swing at the St. Petersburg City Council for not allowing the Rays to look at possible baseball stadium sites outside of St. Petersburg.
• Finally, the never-ending saga of former Cubs farmhand Russ Canzler seems to have ended with Canzler being claimed by Orioles. Canzler was placed on waivers four times this off-season.

And tomorrow will be a better day than today, Buster.