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When I was in high school, there was a variety show every year in which students would perform all manner of routines, a lot of which were song-and-dance numbers and comedy skits. It was the biggest event of the year, something everyone looked forward to. One year, four of my friends performed a barbershop quartet version of the song "One More Minute" by Weird Al Yankovic, and it was the highlight of the entire show. Brought the house down. In case you're not familiar with the song and aren't able to check out the video, the song details the things that Weird Al would rather do than spend one more minute with the girlfriend that just left him.
In the spirit of that song, and as a fun way to vent some frustration, I invite all of the Heroes and Goats readers to come up with the thing you'd rather do than watch Edwin Jackson make one more start. All I ask is that you keep it clean and within community guidelines. Aside from that, have fun with it.
Graphs for Game 126 (courtesy of Fangraphs):
Stats for Game 126:
Pitcher |
IP |
H |
HR |
ER |
BB |
SO |
pLI |
WPA |
K Fujikawa |
2 |
2 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
3 |
0.03 |
.003 |
W Wright |
1 |
2 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
2 |
0.08 |
.003 |
C Villanueva |
3.1 |
2 |
1 |
1 |
0 |
3 |
0.14 |
.000 |
E Jackson |
2.2 |
8 |
1 |
7 |
2 |
2 |
0.88 |
-.483 |
Total |
9 |
14 |
2 |
8 |
2 |
10 |
0.44 |
-.477 |
Batter |
AB |
R |
H |
HR |
RBI |
BB |
SO |
pLI |
WPA |
C Valaika |
4 |
1 |
1 |
1 |
2 |
0 |
1 |
0.43 |
.105 |
L Valbuena |
4 |
2 |
3 |
1 |
1 |
0 |
0 |
0.33 |
.081 |
E Jackson |
1 |
0 |
1 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
0.86 |
.022 |
J Baker |
4 |
0 |
2 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
1 |
0.23 |
.011 |
C Villanueva |
1 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
1 |
0.21 |
-.005 |
M Szczur |
1 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
1 |
0.28 |
-.007 |
C Coghlan |
4 |
0 |
1 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
2 |
0.69 |
-.022 |
R Sweeney |
4 |
0 |
1 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
0.56 |
-.039 |
J Baez |
4 |
0 |
1 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
0.56 |
-.046 |
A Rizzo |
4 |
0 |
1 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
0.39 |
-.049 |
A Alcantara |
4 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
0 |
3 |
0.59 |
-.074 |
Total |
35 |
3 |
11 |
2 |
3 |
0 |
9 |
0.47 |
-.023 |
Writer's Note: The daily selections of the three Heroes and three Goats are based solely on the top three and bottom three WPA scores for the game. The selections are not based on my subjective opinion.
THE THREE GOATS:
- Billy Goat - Edwin Jackson (-.483). I'll start, and I fully admit that I'm not a very creative guy. I'd rather eat an entire bowl of badly burnt popcorn than watch another Edwin Jackson start.
- Goat - Arismendy Alcantara (-.074). Still struggling in the month of August.
- Kid - Anthony Rizzo (-.049). Primarily due to his double play in the third inning.
THE THREE HEROES:
- Superhero - Chris Valaika (.105). Tried to get the Cubs back in it with his two-run shot in the second.
- Hero - Luis Valbuena (.081). His second 3-for-4 day in three games, this time with a homer. He apparently misses being a part of the over-.750 club.
- Sidekick - Edwin Jackson, the hitter (.022). I Googled the word "irony" and this came up: "a state of affairs or an event that seems deliberately contrary to what one expects and is often amusing as a result." If this podium placement doesn't fit that definition to a T, I don't know what does.
-
UPDATED RANKINGS THROUGH GAME 126 (Changes in Bold, Notations Below):
x - Player not on 25-man roster.
y - Player not on 40-man roster.
z - Player no longer with Cubs.
Heroes |
1st |
2nd |
3rd |
Total |
Anthony Rizzo |
15 |
11 |
10 |
77 |
Starlin Castro |
14.5 |
8.5 |
8.5 |
69 |
Luis Valbuena |
12 |
9 |
6 |
60 |
Welington Castillo |
9 |
5.5 |
3.5 |
41.5 |
Justin Ruggiano |
5.5 |
9.5 |
3 |
38.5 |
Jake Arrieta |
7 |
4 |
1 |
30 |
Chris Coghlan |
6 |
5 |
1 |
29 |
z-Jason Hammel |
5 |
4 |
5 |
28 |
z-Nate Schierholtz |
4 |
6 |
3 |
27 |
Ryan Sweeney |
2 |
6 |
6.5 |
24.5 |
z-Jeff Samardzija |
6 |
2 |
2 |
24 |
Travis Wood |
5 |
4 |
1 |
24 |
z-Emilio Bonifacio |
1 |
9 |
1 |
22 |
x-Mike Olt |
3 |
3 |
6 |
21 |
x-Junior Lake |
3 |
3 |
4 |
19 |
x-Brian Schlitter |
1 |
4.5 |
7 |
19 |
z-Darwin Barney |
3.5 |
2.5 |
1 |
16.5 |
Edwin Jackson |
4 |
1 |
2 |
16 |
Arismendy Alcantara |
3 |
2 |
3 |
16 |
Pedro Strop |
1 |
3 |
7 |
16 |
Kyle Hendricks |
4 |
1.5 |
0.5 |
15.5 |
John Baker |
1 |
4 |
3 |
14 |
Hector Rondon |
0 |
1 |
10.5 |
12.5 |
Tsuyoshi Wada |
3 |
1 |
0 |
11 |
Carlos Villanueva |
0 |
3 |
5 |
11 |
Wesley Wright |
0.5 |
3.5 |
2 |
10.5 |
y-Ryan Kalish |
3 |
0 |
1 |
10 |
z-James Russell |
0 |
2 |
6 |
10 |
Justin Grimm |
0 |
2 |
6 |
10 |
Neil Ramirez |
0 |
0.5 |
5.5 |
6.5 |
Chris Valaika |
2 |
0 |
0 |
6 |
Javier Baez |
0 |
2 |
1 |
5 |
x-Zac Rosscup |
0 |
2 |
0 |
4 |
x-Dallas Beeler |
1 |
0 |
0 |
3 |
x-Chris Rusin |
1 |
0 |
0 |
3 |
x-Blake Parker |
0 |
0 |
3 |
3 |
Jacob Turner |
0 |
1 |
0 |
2 |
Kyuji Fujikawa |
0 |
0 |
1 |
1 |
Goats |
1st |
2nd |
3rd |
Total |
z-Nate Schierholtz |
8 |
12 |
7 |
55 |
Starlin Castro |
5 |
11.5 |
14 |
52 |
Luis Valbuena |
7 |
7.5 |
11.5 |
47.5 |
Edwin Jackson |
12 |
3 |
1 |
43 |
Travis Wood |
10 |
4 |
2 |
40 |
x-Junior Lake |
6 |
6 |
8 |
38 |
Anthony Rizzo |
2 |
10 |
8 |
34 |
Welington Castillo |
3 |
8.5 |
7.5 |
33.5 |
Chris Coghlan |
5 |
5 |
5 |
30 |
x-Mike Olt |
5 |
3 |
6 |
27 |
Justin Ruggiano |
2 |
7 |
6 |
26 |
z-Emilio Bonifacio |
1 |
9 |
4 |
25 |
Justin Grimm |
7 |
0.5 |
2.5 |
24.5 |
z-Jason Hammel |
7 |
1 |
0 |
23 |
Hector Rondon |
6 |
2 |
1 |
23 |
Carlos Villanueva |
5 |
1 |
3 |
20 |
z-James Russell |
3 |
3 |
5 |
20 |
Ryan Sweeney |
3 |
3 |
2.5 |
17.5 |
Arismendy Alcantara |
1 |
6 |
2 |
17 |
Pedro Strop |
3 |
3 |
1 |
16 |
John Baker |
3 |
1 |
5 |
16 |
z-Jeff Samardzija |
4 |
1 |
1 |
15 |
z-Darwin Barney |
0 |
6 |
3 |
15 |
Wesley Wright |
3 |
1 |
3 |
14 |
x-Brian Schlitter |
2 |
3 |
1 |
13 |
Jake Arrieta |
3 |
0 |
3 |
12 |
z-Jose Veras |
2 |
1 |
1 |
9 |
y-Ryan Kalish |
1 |
2 |
2 |
9 |
Neil Ramirez |
2 |
0 |
0 |
6 |
y-Eli Whiteside |
1 |
0 |
3 |
6 |
x-Blake Parker |
1 |
0 |
2 |
5 |
x-Dallas Beeler |
1 |
0 |
1 |
4 |
Kyle Hendricks |
0 |
1 |
2 |
4 |
Javier Baez |
0 |
1 |
2 |
4 |
Tsuyoshi Wada |
1 |
0 |
0 |
3 |
x-Dan Straily |
1 |
0 |
0 |
3 |
Chris Valaika |
0 |
1 |
0 |
2 |
Matt Szczur |
0 |
1 |
0 |
2 |
x-Chris Rusin |
0 |
1 |
0 |
2 |
Overall |
Hero |
Goat |
+/- |
Anthony Rizzo |
77 |
34 |
43 |
Jake Arrieta |
30 |
12 |
18 |
Starlin Castro |
69 |
52 |
17 |
Luis Valbuena |
60 |
47.5 |
12.5 |
Justin Ruggiano |
38.5 |
26 |
12.5 |
Kyle Hendricks |
15.5 |
4 |
11.5 |
z-Jeff Samardzija |
24 |
15 |
9 |
Welington Castillo |
41.5 |
33.5 |
8 |
Tsuyoshi Wada |
11 |
3 |
8 |
Ryan Sweeney |
24.5 |
17.5 |
7 |
x-Brian Schlitter |
19 |
13 |
6 |
z-Jason Hammel |
28 |
23 |
5 |
Chris Valaika |
6 |
2 |
4 |
x-Zac Rosscup |
4 |
0 |
4 |
Jacob Turner |
2 |
0 |
2 |
z-Darwin Barney |
16.5 |
15 |
1.5 |
y-Ryan Kalish |
10 |
9 |
1 |
Javier Baez |
5 |
4 |
1 |
x-Chris Rusin |
3 |
2 |
1 |
Kyuji Fujikawa |
1 |
0 |
1 |
Neil Ramirez |
6.5 |
6 |
0.5 |
Pedro Strop |
16 |
16 |
0 |
Chris Coghlan |
29 |
30 |
-1 |
Arismendy Alcantara |
16 |
17 |
-1 |
x-Dallas Beeler |
3 |
4 |
-1 |
John Baker |
14 |
16 |
-2 |
x-Blake Parker |
3 |
5 |
-2 |
Matt Szczur |
0 |
2 |
-2 |
z-Emilio Bonifacio |
22 |
25 |
-3 |
x-Dan Straily |
0 |
3 |
-3 |
Wesley Wright |
10.5 |
14 |
-3.5 |
x-Mike Olt |
21 |
27 |
-6 |
y-Eli Whiteside |
0 |
6 |
-6 |
Carlos Villanueva |
11 |
20 |
-9 |
z-Jose Veras |
0 |
9 |
-9 |
z-James Russell |
10 |
20 |
-10 |
Hector Rondon |
12.5 |
23 |
-10.5 |
Justin Grimm |
10 |
24.5 |
-14.5 |
Travis Wood |
24 |
40 |
-16 |
x-Junior Lake |
19 |
38 |
-19 |
Edwin Jackson |
16 |
43 |
-27 |
z-Nate Schierholtz |
27 |
55 |
-28 |