Cubs Song: 'The Sound Of Bryant'

When I heard the news that Kris Bryant was coming to the Cubs last night I was in the middle of a 16-hour creative tizzy producing comedy content. When I work too much, I can't shut off my brain, and thus can't sleep. Added to this manic episode is the excitement of Kris Bryant coming up to the Cubs on a beautiful spring day at Wrigley for a game for which I have tickets.

Good for Theo giving fans what we all want as soon as we can have him!

At 4 o'clock this morning I brewed some coffee and wrote this song. Much to the chagrin of my neighbors, I recorded it a few short hours later.

The Sounds of Bryant

Hello Wrigley, my old friend

I’m watching baseball here again

Because Kris Bryant’s been promoted

Now the Cubs roster is loaded

The decision that Theo Epstein has made

Let him play

Coming up now: Kris Bryant

I had a dream we won it all

The champions of baseball

The Cubbies could never be champs

With Kris Bryant down in minor league camp

But the Cubs have brought Bryant up to the major leagues

Injuries

We need him now Kris Bryant

And Scott Boras is super pissed

Cause of the contract year they missed

The 12 service days they waited

Means his contracts not inflated

Yeah it might be wrong but fans don’t really care that it’s not fair

He’s a cash cow, Kris Bryant

Though his agent is annoyed

Cubbie fans are overjoyed

Cause we finally have a hitter

To make up for Brian Schlitter

And the Cubs said, NL Central pitchers

Are giving the home run balls and bullpen calls

Chase you from the mound Kris Bryant