There was a Twitter meme going around yesterday about writing the saddest story using only four words. A lot of people took this as an opportunity to write baseball-themed sad stories. Al wrote "Alou, under the ball . . ." My humble contribution was "Ball through Durham's legs."
Yeah, it's been a slow news week. The sports pages are filled with stories of a different sport right now.
- How slow is it? The big news is that the Orioles acquired Odrisamer Despaigne from the Padres for minor league pitcher Jean Cosme.
- Ken Rosenthal reports that the Orioles, even after trading for Despaigne, are still interested in signing Yovani Gallardo.
- The Orioles are also "interested" in Tim Lincecum.
- The other big news is that Jonny Gomes has signed with the Rakuten Golden Eagles of NPB.
- Drew Smyly won his arbitration hearing. That's news, I guess.
- And late-breaking news is that Gavin Floyd is close to a deal with the Blue Jays.
- Speaking of that other sport, Jayson Stark writes that despite general public opinion to the contrary, MLB has much more parity than the NFL. The NFL has a much better public relations strategy though. It's mostly "Say anything bad about us and we'll cut you off."
- On the state of parity, Dayn Perry explains why MLB does not have a problem with teams "tanking." I'm fully in his camp. This isn't an issue MLB should be worried about at the moment.
- Grant Brisbee comes up with a solution to solve the problem of tanking that isn't really a solution. His cure is worse that the disease, and that's his point.
- Demetrius Bell says that if the Braves are going to be tanking, now is the time to do it.
- Howie Kendrick, who got significantly less than expected on the free agent market, criticized the current qualifying offer system.
- Dave Cameron argues that all the major issues that we're debating in the game are the result of the age of the most productive players getting younger.
- Here's a new issue though. Michael Baumann wonders if winning baseball is boring baseball. I've got to admit though. I find players hitting home runs a lot more exciting that watching them bunt.
- The Blue Jays are installing a dirt infield at the Rogers Centre.
- David Laurila asks players which current players would make good managers.
- Craig Calcaterra notes that if you're a white catcher, you're management material.
- Stephania Bell profiles five players coming back from injury in 2016.
- And here are some statistical milestones to look out for in 2016. By the way, I'm going to call Ichiro Suzuki "The all-time hit king" when he passes Rose, even though it doesn't count. Just because it makes Rose so angry when you even mention Ichiro's total hits.
- The Dodgers are telling teams calling about Yasiel Puig that they're not going to trade him.
- Yoenis Cespedes said something that is pretty apparent to everyone: His first choice of teams to sign with was always the Mets.
- Perhaps because Cespedes still wants to go out for Cuban sandwiches with Jerry Seinfeld.
- Mike Axisa estimates how much it would cost the Mets to lock up their ace pitching rotation to long-term extensions.
- Richard Justice has six longshots who could make the playoffs in 2016.
- We have some details on the Rays' trip to Cuba this spring.
- Twins GM Terry Ryan admitted that he made a mistake when he released David Ortiz back in 2003. Just a little one though. (Ryan actually admits it was a whopper.)
- Cliff Corcoran looks at Baseball Prospectus' and MLB.com's top prospects lists and ranks the top and bottom five farm systems. The Cubs are still near the top.
- The Padres plan on counting on their farm system for a team turnaround this season. Unlike last season, of course.
- A talk with Jason Benetti, the newest White Sox broadcaster. He can put it on the board, yes.
- What happened to the other seven, non-Joe Jackson, Chicago "Black Sox." Heh. Buck Weaver turned down a chance to be a partner in a drug store with Charles Walgreen. His life was full of bad choices. Heh.
- Anthony Castrovince asks what if baseball teams had political slogans?
- And finally, if you're a fan of the "Major League" movies, the minor league Akron RubberDucks (it's actually one word there) are going to give out a Willie Mays Hayes bobblehead doll. Or "bobble legs" doll, according to them.
And tomorrow will be a better day than today, Buster. Go whatever team you want to win that silly football game.