In the previous installment of our series, Cub Tracks mustered up a collection of various ingredients and assembled them on white bread, toasted, with cheese. Subreferences and bad jokes abounded, Ursula LeGuin, as well as tweets and quotes, which were added for garnish.
Speaking of garnish, the Chris Correa sentence was handed down. I'm with Ken Rosenthal and John Arguello -- not enough, to me (Tony Andracki disagrees*). Does not place St. Louis at a competitive imbalance sufficient to make recompense for the crime. Alleged rulebreakers have been treated with more vehemence. I would have preferred a complete draft absence (at least one) and perhaps making the team play in one of the casinos around Joplin or on a flat-bottomed boat, but then I'm vindictive like that, having had to negotiate that twisted little ramp from I-55 to I-44 perhaps one too many times. Once I had to drive from Eureka to Oklahoma City in a decrepit Ford F-150 with no starter on Memorial Day, and this looms large in my evaluation of all things Missouri.
Chris Correa should have to repeat that performance. Maybe that would satisfy me. Once his left knee was numbed by the clutch kicking back like the mule it is and he got tired enough of pushing the two-ton turd downhill to get it going again, perhaps he would repent. Or he could be sent to Siberia, where his skillset would play well. Yeah. Dirty pool for a dirty duck.
Ahem. Or, as Bobby London would have it, A-Henh!
Related to an article from the last edition:
Thanks for the Schwarber bomb, @kschwarb12 pic.twitter.com/6Khx6FGOsX— Bret Beherns (@WCIA3Bret) January 28, 2017
"A point of view can be a dangerous luxury when substituted for insight and understanding." -- Marshall McLuhan
Let's move on to bigger and better things, shall we? We are after all in the infotainment business, where the spin is in and white-knuckle maneuvering is the preamble that we the people prefer. After all, as the man says, I don't necessarily agree with everything that I say. We play chicken with the truth in this line of work, and never allow a fool who knows what he is talking about to ruin a good argument.
"Art is anything you can get away with."-- Marshall McLuhan
Now we're talking. Gaylord Perry certainly knew that there was an art to artifice in a way that Rick Honeycutt never quite grasped, though he seemed to have gotten the point for a while. Charlie Hough and Joe Niekro nailed it, self-administering manicures at their leisure and filing away the results for later.
"Most of our assumptions have outlived their uselessness." -- Marshall McLuhan
"Baseball is an ass." -- Mike Marshall
"Howdy, Chester." -- Marshall Dillon
Great guns! How did that get in there? Let's proceed to a little baseball history. Great stuff. Such a fascinating legacy.
Today in Baseball History:
- 1927 - N.L. President John Heydler rules that Rogers Hornsby cannot continue to both hold stock in the Cardinals and play for the Giants.
- 1952 - The Hall of Fame elects two new members: Harry Heilmann, with 203 votes, and Paul Waner with 195. Waner, a .333 career hitter, rapped out 3,152 hits and struck out just 376 times in 9,459 career at-bats. Heilmann was similarly skilled with the bat, winning four batting titles with the Tigers and finishing his career with a .342 average.
- 1953 - New York, Cleveland, and Boston retaliate at Bill Veeck, forcing the Browns to play afternoon games to avoid sharing TV revenues. Veeck takes his plan to the A.L. office to make them pay. The plan is rejected.
- 1959 - Former Senators and Red Sox player-manager Joe Cronin signs a seven-year pact to become head of the A.L.
- 1961 - Houston voters approve a bond to finance the construction of a luxury domed stadium, clearing the final hurdle standing between the city and Major League Baseball.
- 1965 - Pud Galvin is chosen for Hall of Fame induction by the Special Veterans Committee. Galvin had 20 victories in ten out of 14 seasons and won 46 games in both 1883 and 1884 for Buffalo.
- 1971 - The Hall of Fame Special Veterans Committee selects seven men for enshrinement: former players Jake Beckley, Joe Kelley, Harry Hooper, Rube Marquard, Chick Hafey, and Dave Bancroft, as well as executive George Weiss.
- 1977 - The Special Veterans Committee selects Joe Sewell, Amos Rusie, and Al Lopez for the Hall of Fame. Sewell batted .312 over 14 seasons with the Indians and Yankees. Rusie won 246 games over nine seasons from 1889 to 1898. Lopez won four fielding titles in 19 years as a catcher, but it was his .584 winning percentage in 17 seasons as a manager that got him into Cooperstown.
That's the good stuff. Pud Galvin is one of the all-time best names. Rogers Hornsby is one of the all-time best villains. And Bill Veeck. Man. A lot of the things he did were questionable, but you couldn't ask for a more colorful figure.His autobiography (Veeck as in Wreck) was one of the best baseball reads ever. The link has a sample. Speaking of reads, let's take a look at what the baseball writers have to say about current baseball events. As always * means autoplay on (directions to remove for Firefox and Chrome).
"I am dead set against free agency. It can ruin baseball." -- George Steinbrenner
"First we build the tools, then they build us."-- Marshall McLuhan
- Carrie Muskat (MLB.com):Take a seat! Own a piece of Wrigley history. "Starting Friday, the Cubs will sell limited quantities of seat sets that were removed and replaced as part of the ongoing restoration project at the ballpark."
- Carrie Muskat (MLB.com):Anthony Rizzo challenges fans to dance for ducats. "...he's invited fans to submit a video to win two tickets to a Cubs game." #Twerkin4Tix
- CBS Sports:Anthony Rizzo might have too much time on his hands right now. Includes fan videos.
- David Schoenfield (ESPN): Who's motivated in 2017 to earn his next contract? Jake Arrieta, for one.
- Michael Cerami (Baseball Is Fun): How would you feel about a Home Run Derby, instead of extra-innings? I don't like the shootout in the NHL, so, for me, no. Maybe in the All-Star Game, but not in regular-season or playoff contests.
- Michael Bradburn (MLB Daily Dish): Royals rumors: Kansas City interested in Jason Hammel. Doug Fister is also an option. Bad year for medium-tier free agent pitchers. Jacob R Misener from Cubbies Crib chimes in on Hammel.
- Brendan Miller (Cubs Insider):Let’s talk about FIP’s shortcomings as seen in Jason Hammel’s performance. "...why hasn’t he signed?
- Evan Altman (Cubs Insider): The upcoming season might be Joe Maddon’s most challenging yet. "Which burden is heavier, that of failure or success?"
- Randy Holt (Wrigleyville-Baseball Prospectus):Jon Jay’s significance to the 2017 Cubs. "That fourth outfielder role is what Jay’s skill set would best allow him to fulfill." Agreed. But that depends on Albert Almora, Jr's success.
- Jared Wyllys (Wrigleyville-Baseball Prospectus): Transaction Analysis: Brett Anderson. "His job won’t be to carry the back of the rotation, but rather to extend it when needed."
- Vincent Frank (Sportsnaut):Former MLB pitcher Anthony Young reportedly has inoperable brain tumor. Sad news about the former Met/Cub/Astro.
- Tim Huwe (the Zygote 50): Spring training snubs. There's a limit to how many people could be useful.
Food for thought:
- Sid Perkins (Science): Earth is sending oxygen to the moon. "A small bit of Earth’s air leaks into space each day."
- Pallab Ghosh (BBC News):Scientists find 'oldest human ancestor'. It apparently excreted and ingested from the same orifice.
- Emily Conover (Science News): Possible sign of dark matter shows up again. "This is a very exciting thing," says astrophysicist Nico Cappelluti of Yale University.
Thanks for reading. Smell you Thursday. Here’s the GoFundMe for an anthology I’m editing.