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Cub Tracks is armed and dangerously

#Cubs and #MLB news you can use.

Chris Sweda/Chicago Tribune/Tribune News Service via Getty Images

Cub Tracks apologizes for harboring any thoughts of Justin Turner, Dodgers management, or MLB officials having any sense of actual responsibility and we would like to say that we’re sorry that such sorry excuses for humanity not only populate the planet but are looked up to as examples and role models for all of you young baseball players out there (see this fargin great article). Once. We are sorry once. Your fault if you weren’t looking.

We have spent this entire week in a caffeine-fueled deep dive into electoral politesse and are in no mood for niceties. Apologies for our French and for our short temper but what the actual gamethread word was that heap of bovine guano?

I can’t even. So I ain’t gonna. But that there are going to be no penalties whatsoever for that behavior makes my skin crawl like a disembodied hand, and it’s way too early for Svengoolie, so we’ll have to go with Joel and his friends.

Meanwhile, back at Cub Tracks News and Notes, we are closing in on our eighth anniversary. Hold the ranch! As always, * means autoplay on, or annoying ads, or both (directions to remove for Firefox and Chrome). {$} means paywall. {$} means limited views. Italics are often used on this page as sarcasm font. (In the comments section, use @ before and after your remarks @ to produce sarcasm font.)

Food for thought:

Thanks for reading.