clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:

‘Twas the night before Cub Christmas

An annual affront to Clement Clarke Moore.

‘Twas the night before Cub Christmas, we hope to be rid
In ‘21 of the Earthly scourge known as COVID
The Chicago Cubs’ future is up in the air,
Theo’s out, but good ol’ Jed — he is still there.

The 2020 Cubs, indeed all MLB,
Had to wait till July for baseball to see.
And watch the Cubs we did, though not in the park
On Marquee they were shown, with some left in the dark.

Four seasons have passed since the World Series win
(“Better than 108,” I thought with a grin.)
Tom Ricketts said that team losses were “biblical”
If there isn’t more cash, though, the Cubs will be pitiful.

Then out on the field there arose such a clatter,
I ran to the ballpark to see what was the matter.
And then what should appear, as if in a dream:
A blue-and-white sleigh carrying a baseball team!

The returning sleigh driver was the guy called Grandpa,
David Ross did a good job of laying down the law.
Swifter than Kimbrel’s pitches the players they came,
And Rossy whistled, and shouted, and called them by name!

”Now, Bryant! Now, Rizzo!
Now, Javy! Now, Bote
On, Nico! On, Willson!
On J-Hey and Happ!

“Forget that launch angle!
Just please hit the ball!
They’ll play ‘em all hard
Hope to be there next fall!”

And then, in a twinkling, I saw Jed’s intent face
Planning, he was, on a future pennant race.
When he went to look for players who might be around,
Where’s the money, Tom Ricketts? It cannot be found.

Still, Jed kept the old look of chinos and polo shirt,
And he brought some who’ll play on the Wrigley Field dirt.
There were only new minor-league guys on the roster,
Money’s tight, Jed said, winning might be harder.

The brown leaves that fall from the ivy walls die,
When they start to grow, Hendricks’ changeup will fly.
Wrigley’s first ‘21 game will be on April Fool’s Day,
Did I just say “Fool”? We’ll see if that stays.

Alec Mills threw a no-hitter, surprising us all
Here’s hoping fewer of his offerings go over the wall.
Rizzo and Javy are in the last year of their contracts
In 2021, hopefully, they’ll make lots more contact.

Kris Bryant spent the whole year nursing injuries
Fans are split about trading the ex-MVP.
Alzolay and Marquez: What will they become?
Will they be good pitchers? Or just two more bums?

Yu Darvish — man, that whole year was so nice
He hardly walked anyone and on Twitter gave advice.
Len Kasper left us for the Sox broadcast crew
Wants to do radio. I believe him. Don’t you?

When Heyward and Vargas homered in Milwaukee
It felt like a postseason run could happen — maybe
But the loss to Miami that came in the fall
Means that changes are coming to Cubs baseball.

So we enter ‘21 with baseball uncertainty,
They’ll gather in Mesa in March, hopefully.
Rossy and the guys will put up the good fight.
Happy Cub Christmas to all, and to all a good night!