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Cub Tracks buries the living

#Cubs, #MiLB, and #MLB news for you

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Arizona Diamondbacks v Chicago Cubs Photo by David Banks/Getty Images

Here at CUB TRACKS NEWS AND NOTES™, we have news for you. The going got weird quite a while ago, but the Chicago Cubs’ 2021 season is finally over. We are spared that particular horrorshow, but we’re not spared the post-apocalyptic, as we’ve signed on for the director’s cut. Surely that doesn’t exactly drop the bomb on you.

“That number has been retired. No further calls are being taken by...”

Surely Jed Hoyer’s phone is ringing. Is it the new GM? Only time will tell. This song isn’t over. In the meantime, please feel free to enjoy this collection of elegies, eulogies, and merrie melodies, from our usual cast, stitched together to meet our dead line.

Hey, at least the Cubs weren’t the DOORMAT of the National League. They were a parts car at the ivy-covered junkyard, and will probably end up in Bensenville with the rest of the parks and wrecks department.

So much for the classic pyramid lede. I want my mummy.

Comedy gold.

The ‘elder rookies’ probably won’t toe this line again. But they almost certainly will be given the opportunity. I gazed into the abyss and Frank Schwindel gazed back at me.

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Food for thought:

Thanks for reading.